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Friday, 18 September 2009

Let’s hear it for the animals!

Where is the animal-rights lobby when you need it?

It’s sure needed at the moment, because there’s a huge rise in the popularity of, and therefore the demand for, barbarically slaughtered food, which some deluded people seem to think they have to eat because a sky fairy told them to.

Many animal-rights activists – those, anyway, who object to our eating animals, no matter how humanely they’re slaughtered, as opposed objecting to testing cosmetics on animals, which is the real evil – are a tad touchy-feely in other respects too.

They’re therefore more likely to tread lightly with their convictions on ritual slaughter if the alternative is to upset religionists, particularly those of a religion practised chiefly by members of other ethnic groups.

So, when I see marches of animal-rights protestors objecting to halal and kosher slaughter, I’ll begin to eat the above words, which will first be humanely slaughtered, of course.

2 comments:

  1. I've got one better for you.

    Mention to your vegan friends that plants are living things too. Also mention we're denying their genetic right and eating the progeny of said plants.

    Can't you just hear their tiny little screams when you pluck a tomato from a vine?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Just remember that opposition to kosher and halal slaughter led a lot to fascism. It's not a big step from condemning the method to condemning the people.

    ReplyDelete

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