Does God hate penguins too?

Everyboby loves a penguin, except maybe the creepy one in Wallace & Gromit's The Wrong Trousers. But in Bremerhaven Zoo, in northern Germany, two homosexual penguins have hatched an egg that was abandoned and are now rearing the chick.

All together now: "Ahhhhhhh!"

"Z and Vielpunkt, both males, gladly accepted their Easter present and began straight away with hatching the egg," the zoo said. "They are behaving in the same way as one would expect a heterosexual couple to" (bickering, presumably, and arguing over the remote control). "Both happy fathers are now diligently handling the everyday care of their adopted offspring," the zoo announced.

Z and Vielpunkt are part of a six-strong gay community among the zoo’s collection of endangered Humboldt penguins. In 2005 four Swedish females were introduced in an unsuccessful and controversial attempt to "cure" them, but the six males just flounced off muttering something about fish.

If barking mad evangelical Christians insist that God Hates Fags, then presumably God hates Z and Vielpunkt and the rest of the gay penguins who have turned Bremerhaven into an outpost of the Castro too!

Yet if homosexuality isn't "natural", how come we see it occurring naturally in penguins and many other species, like apes and dolphins? They do not have free will and therefore haven't chosen to deviate from God's pre-ordained sexual path. Their behaviour is motivated by natural instinct.

"Homosexuality is nothing unusual among animals," said the Bremerhaven zoo spokesman. "Sex and coupling up in our world do not necessarily have anything to do with reproduction."

This demolishes the argument of Christian numpties everywhere that homosexuality is unnatural. It clearly is natural and has always been part of the evolutionary journey on Planet Earth, no doubt playing some vital role in securing the sociability and success of the higher species, including mankind.

If God Hates Fags, then He hates all mankind and everything else He created, which begs the question, why did the silly old sky-fairy bother with the Creation in the first place?